Looking for the Middle Ground
There is this tightrope walk that happens to me... and at any given moment, I'm apt to fall off on either side into an unrecoverable chasm. Certainly, I'm not the first or last missionary to just want to get off the tightrope all together.
What is this tightrope?
The tension between conveying enough information about life/work here to give supporters and prayer partners the accountability they deserve vs. coming across as 'look at me', or somehow portraying that we are perfect missionaries or worse, distorting results.
In our slick, shiny US church culture, it seems that even missionaries get caught up in the hype. With the pressure to survive on the donations of others, how to we communicate without distorting? This is the tightrope.
You need to know that life on the mission field is the single most difficult thing I've ever experienced. You need to know that there are so many moments of every day that I want to tell you about, but can't seem to get the words out. You need to know that many days are just normal living - we aren't non-stop evangelists or humanitarian heroes. You need to know that nothing accomplished here is our work - it is the work of many unsung, unspoken people who do not like thank-you notes or public recognition.
We want to be accountable to those who sacrifice to support our family and Reach Out Honduras. It is a joy to be able to share the fruit of their investment.
But, what happens when 'results' aren't tangible or when 'results' are not what we or our supporters expected?
What happens when our opinions of orphanages and orphan care have drastically changed? What happens when the things we've seen with our own eyes do not 'fit' with textbooks on how mission work is supposed to go? What happens if I'm the one whose life is 'saved' because I'm here? What happens when we start to ask the very hard questions about mission programs in general?
Instead of trying to walk the tightrope, maybe I should just throw myself stomach-down on the rope and inch my way across on my belly. Safer, I suppose.... but I'd rather get it wrong at times, risk falling and move along with God at a good pace than crawl safely along and never reach the other side.
As always, your thoughts sharpen mine.
What is this tightrope?
The tension between conveying enough information about life/work here to give supporters and prayer partners the accountability they deserve vs. coming across as 'look at me', or somehow portraying that we are perfect missionaries or worse, distorting results.
In our slick, shiny US church culture, it seems that even missionaries get caught up in the hype. With the pressure to survive on the donations of others, how to we communicate without distorting? This is the tightrope.
You need to know that life on the mission field is the single most difficult thing I've ever experienced. You need to know that there are so many moments of every day that I want to tell you about, but can't seem to get the words out. You need to know that many days are just normal living - we aren't non-stop evangelists or humanitarian heroes. You need to know that nothing accomplished here is our work - it is the work of many unsung, unspoken people who do not like thank-you notes or public recognition.
We want to be accountable to those who sacrifice to support our family and Reach Out Honduras. It is a joy to be able to share the fruit of their investment.
But, what happens when 'results' aren't tangible or when 'results' are not what we or our supporters expected?
What happens when our opinions of orphanages and orphan care have drastically changed? What happens when the things we've seen with our own eyes do not 'fit' with textbooks on how mission work is supposed to go? What happens if I'm the one whose life is 'saved' because I'm here? What happens when we start to ask the very hard questions about mission programs in general?
Instead of trying to walk the tightrope, maybe I should just throw myself stomach-down on the rope and inch my way across on my belly. Safer, I suppose.... but I'd rather get it wrong at times, risk falling and move along with God at a good pace than crawl safely along and never reach the other side.
As always, your thoughts sharpen mine.
Comments
Too often I see people try to put on a show to make themselves look better or more impressive in the eyes of others. I am who I am, and whether or not that is impressive is really not my problem. I'm sure who I am is not impressive to most people and that's fine. My ultimate judge is not the people around me. I will do what I am called to do with no eye towards what people think.
All that said, do the work God has called you to in Honduras. Be Jesus to those kids and others you come into contact with. Share the Gospel, share Jesus with them and all else will take care of itself. Sometimes the unexpected things can be the biggest blessings. I point you to our youngest daughter for proof of that.