Proud to be a Follower

For so much of my life, I wanted to be the leader. You see, in most situations the leader was cool, intellegent, hysterical, daring, popular, etc. Throughout college I tried and, to some worldly extent, was successful at the leader-thing. And yet, while I loved the relationships and the attention, leadership is not my 'gift.'

Moving to the spiritual realm, our small group is deep in the midst of a study on spiritual gifting. Hmmm. This has been a challenging topic for me. You see, for years I thought leadership was my gift... yet it wasn't. And then, I thought encouragement/exhortation was my gift... and I functioned half-heartedly attempting to encourage others. And today, I see that I fit somewhere in the service/compassion/mercy gifting... but yet I'm still so opinionated. How can someone who sounds like a clanging gong be filled with quiet mercy :)? (she asks, smiling)

I have no answers for this. God's Word says we all have at least one spiritual gift; with that I rest. Somewhere within the complicated lady that I am lays a gift that is waiting to be opened and used for the benefit of the Body of Christ. My job is to listen carefully as the experiences of my life, the encouragement of those who know me and the things that move me reveal that gift..

Until that time, I'm happy to be just a follower... a follower of Christ, that is. I'm preparing to teach the K-2nd kids at VBS at our church later this month. My preparation led me to Matthew 4:18-22. Jesus calls to Andrew & Simon Peter, "Follow Me, and I will make you fishers of men." The next verse tells of their response... "Immediately they left their nets and followed Him."

There it is... Christ's call to follow Him and He will make me a 'fisher of men/women/children.' He does the work. My choice is to immediately follow... the Word says immediately. It does not say 'after you discover your spiritual gift and exercise it appropriately for my Kingdom.' It does not say 'after you've gotten all of your earthly ducks in a row.' It does not say 'after you've packed up all of your worldy possessions to take with you.' It says that Andrew & Peter followed immediately.

I'm laying down my net... I'm walking in that sand following His footprints. I'm immediately dropping the worldy and picking up the heavenly. I'm preparing my arms to hold and love babies. I'm imagining the faces of children who have to know that God loves them, too. My desire for leadership fades and my desire to be nothing more than His brings everything into technicolor.

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